heaven on two legs

we're on our fourth or so day on the tour, admittedly a little tired already, though i would say i am just not yet "tour fit" and with time i will adjust. we spent an emotional (for me anyhow) 36 hours in tucson, after a big drive through the desert from LA. a surprisingly interesting evening in LA, the show was ok, a little strange, but we stayed with a lovely friend we met a couple of years ago in guatemala, her apartment was right in the heart of hollywood, a beautiful palm tree lined street filled with little art deco apartments, green lawns with sprinklers and beautiful people walking around everywhere. People bag LA, but i love it. i think it is one of the most honest cities there is - it doesn't deny what it is, or pretend to be anything else. this is why i respect it. so when people say they don't like it, i stand up for it. i like the sprawling suburbs, i like the trashiness of it, i like hollywood, i don't know why i just do.

tucson is pretty honest too, i have to say. a desert town full of desert dreamers, it is sometimes like a dream just to walk around there. the heat is oppressive, the mood is slow and it is a place where you feel like anything can happen yet probably nothing really does. or maybe it does. still not sure about this. we met a bunch of friendly folk, a lovely girl amy who helped put is up, fed us enchilada on arrival, and entertained us with her pure goodness - an intense energy, all with heart. it was a true pleasure to meet her and be hosted by her kind nature.

yesterday i took a drive around town in the band van, feeling pretty strange i felt an intense need to do an almost stalk like drive by old places of my past - my old house where i lived in tucson, the bars i frequented. i surprised myself by driving past my old love's house while i was out getting a phone card. i just parked the car, took a moment to reflect, shed a small tear, then drove on out of there. it was a strange experience - strangely solidifying, comforting in a sadistic sort of way. i think after all these years, i am only realising now that i got my heart truly broken and i have just covered it up and suppressed the bad feelings. i am only now dealing with it and owning up to myself all about my past. 

right now i am sitting in a chain diner in el paso, texas. we just arrived, and to be honest it feels like a strange city already. there is a sad, homeless man wearing a wig that looks like a dead animal. i feel so sad to look at him yet am finding it hard to look away. i feel guilty to even think of laughing, but admittedly it is a strangely funny sight. i am drinking delicious strawberry lemonade and considering a piece of key lime pie.

we are playing at a show night called "suck and blow" at a club called zeppelins, and right now i feel like hopping in a couch in my tracksuit and watching a will farrell movie..! but oh well, i'm sure, like always, it will end up fine. it's pretty confronting playing in these types of places, you never really know what to expect - whether they'll think we're complete freaks, or that they're complete freaks and they really dig what we do.. either way, you never really know until the minute you start playing, and then you know for sure..

in our LA show a guy came along to see us play from san bernadino, he ended up being a real sweetie - a mexican guy who for some strange reason had found a love for indie music, had started to learn the banjo and owned an autoharp. he has a warm and genuine nature, and an extremely perceptive mind. he loves his mother and refers to her as "heaven on two legs", a phrase i will never forget and i will try to use in the future. leyna calls these guys "superfans" - people who are really into what we do - but i really love them, and i love to meet people who get what we do - call me a narcissist, but it's nice to have people say they like what you do every now and then. i like it also that our "superfans" seem to be an endlessly random collection of strangers - friendly, weird, awkward, kind, interested and interesting. i wouldn't have it any other way. i think i am one of them too - not necessarily carrying all those traits, but definitely the weird and awkward part. last night when we played in tucson a guy came and bought our cd who was in the military and worked at the airforce base there. to me, the most unlikely candidate for a fan. this is what i love.

we are 5 minutes from the mexican border, and to be honest i feel like skipping the show and running for the border, spending a night in a seedy border town, eating street tacos and drinking cheap mexican beer. but that's not going to happen. one can still dream though....

will write more soon. until then.